Marion County Commission: Delay the referendum, prepare the Octagon for battle

On Tuesday, Marion County commissioners were to decide how voters would participate in a referendum to determine if a three-year, half-cent sales tax would be levied for the construction of a new 4,500-seat stadium for the Yankees single-A club, which currently plays its games in Tampa.  Would the ballot simply be mailed to all registered voters or would there be a traditional ballot, consisting of (a) mail-in votes, (b) early voting at the polls, and (c) standard day-of participation?  For reasons probably known only to the power-wielding elite of the local Ocala Moose Lodge and their Trilateral Commission Overlords, there was disagreement among the Commission as to which method would most benefit the glorious Peoples of Marion County.  However, on the matter of delay, there was unanimous agreement.  The commissioners decided to postpone the decision until January 7th, when the matter will be settled, once and for all, in a greased octagon lit by a single torch and bathed in the fervent exhortations of Ocala’s citizenry.

octagon

Ocala.com has the details.

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Marion County commissioners to decide voting method for proposed Ocala stadium tax hike

Proposed Yankee Stadium in Ocala would seat 4,500.

Proposed Yankee Stadium in Ocala would seat 4,500.

Proposed Yankee Stadium for Marion County

Proposed Yankee Stadium for Marion County.

To state that the BBB is not in the business of reporting news is to suggest that it is in the business of anything at all, which is clearly not the case.  However, the purpose of this post is to inform you of important facts.  So, by way of the links below, we’ll leave the reporting to the professionals.  If you’d like, you can click the links right away, like some kind of bubbleheaded nincompoop, or you can indulge us with the following nutshell so as to familiarize yourself with the subject at hand.

On Tuesday, Marion County commissioners will decide the method by which residents will vote for or against a tax increase.  The proposed three-year, half-cent sales tax hike is intended to pay for a new stadium in Ocala for the Yankees’ single-A minor league club, currently headquartered at George Steinbrenner Field in Tampa.  Tomorrow’s vote is simply to decide whether the vote will be exclusively by mail, or if the vote will be of the traditional variety.  A traditional voting method is expected to generate less voter participation than an all mail-in vote.  If the project is successful, the Tampa Yankees will begin playing in the new stadium in April 2016.  There are no plans to move the Major League Yankees’ spring training away from Steinbrenner Field.

Ocala StarBanner

Ocala StarBanner

WFTV

WFTV

In the coming months, there will no doubt be many a business leader and local politician uttering the dubious phrase, “This new stadium will put Ocala on the map.”

 

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Minors Imitating Majors: Nick Goody

james_brown's_celebrity_hot_tub_party01

You may click to enlarge the Funk.

You may click to enlarge the Funk.

There are some among us whose style, whose carriage, is so unique we are compelled to imitate it.  We should forgive ourselves of this, and rebuke those who would deny us our imitation, for we are but mortal and cannot be expected to throw on the bedraggled rags of shabbiness when the vestments of divine Funk are near.  Like Eddie Murphy robed in the sweaty velvet of Soul, we dip our toes into the Celebrity Tub that is HOT, and in the process, stave off banality for one more day.

Nick Goody

So Please, Please, Please, join me in remarking that Nick Goody, number 58 of the Tampa Yankees, resembles Jonathan Papelbon, also number 58, of the Philadelphia Phillies.  Let us enumerate as we contemplate the ways in which they are similar:

1.       Pre-pitch flat back

2.      Pre-pitch hanging right arm

3.      Pre-pitch left foot double tap

4.      Pre-pitch glove positioning at right shoulder

5.      Mid-delivery left knee raise across body

6.      Mid-delivery high right leg whip

7.      Post-pitch hop

 

First, the exemplar (Sep. 30, 2012):

Now, the mimic.  The official BBB videographer, who it seems is apathetic towards the lint on his lens or he would have done something about it by now, captured video of Mr. Goody at Florida Auto Exchange Stadium in Dunedin (Aug 29, 2012):

The attentive viewer will note Mr. Goody discourages stolen base attempts by expediting his knee raise while third base is open and a runner is on second, but that doing so is unnecessary while second and third bases are occupied.

This has been the second installment of Minors Imitating Majors

Inflatamaniacs

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Attention reader:  Please power on your home all-in-one printer/copier/scanner.  Use the all-in-one printer/copier/scanner software to ensure your device’s color ink cartridge levels are sufficient.  With your feet shoulder width apart, bend at the knees and print this internet post containing the Inflatamaniacs character biographies shown below. Using a no. 2 pencil and your wooden ruler, connect the Inflatamaniacs character on the left to the matching character biography on the right.  When you are finished, turn your paper facedown and remain seated until the proctor collects the exams.  If you matched the characters correctly, report to the principal’s office immediately because you are subtly racist.

Connections


The official BBB videographer, who we shouldn’t give up on just yet, captured the following Inflatamaniacs as they thrilled and delighted the crowd during the 2012 Florida State League All-Star Game at Charlotte Sports Park in Port Charlotte.

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Jim Thome is Trying Hard to Get to Third Base

On March 5th, 2012, at Bright House Field in Clearwater, Florida, Jim Thome was 6 foot 3 inches, 250 pounds, and 41 years old all day long.  Also on that day, Jim Thome was the stuff of legend, having previously hit 604 home runs, amassed 71.5 career WAR, and maintained a career .406 wOBA and a 145 wRC+ over his 21-year career.  For all of these number-y type reasons, he probably should not have stayed in the game after hitting a double in the fourth inning of an early March spring training game.  But he did, and the official BBB videographer, who is not very skilled but means well, was there to capture the moment.

Now, when Jim Thome enters the field of play, he takes it.  He takes it, and he enters it, like a stallion takes and enters a mare.  Nay, he enters the field of play, taking it in the process, on a chariot pulled by forty magnificent stallions, each named in honor of glorious notions like Dominion, Liberty, and Emancipation, to name but a few.  He then dismounts the chariot and enters the batter’s box trumpeting his presence with appendage extended, batting implement erect and purposeful.  The elegantly trotting stallion train exits stage left, shitting copiously and indiscriminately a carpet of perfect white doves, each destined for the heavens on wings whispered by angel’s breath.

Then Jim Thome hit that double and when he ran the bases, all 250 pounds and 41 years of him looked like this:

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Florida Baseball Foliage

Attention all Florida minor league, spring training, and major league baseball landscapers.  There are many species of palm trees, some more pleasing to the eye than others.  Please refer to the images below when ordering new palm trees.  That is all.

Bright House Field, Clearwater, FL

Bright House Field, Clearwater, FL

mckechnie

trop

ugly

(I would not dare sully the good name of this ballpark, a grande dame of Florida baseball.  So, its identity shall remain concealed as it is otherwise quaint, historic, and no longer home to any major or minor league teams.  It did, however, host a recent baseball tournament.)

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